I was about to go to sleep when a car alarm went off. It kept on going so I went to the window to see which stupid car it was. It was some SUV parked across the street, the trunk was open. But no one showed up. After a couple of long minutes, it finally shut itself off. I was about to go back when I saw two nicely dressed women scampering around the corner. One of them squatted on the sidewalk to pee while the other tried to cover her.
Ugh. I just know I’ll have either a sleepless night or nightmares.
Sigh – the quality of my writing has reached a new depth.
There are days when I feel I know what I want out of life and what I need to do to re-invent my career. And then there are days when I don’t have a clue what to do with my life.
Life is a journey and its meaning will likely remain mysterious to me right to the last day of my existence.
Where can I get some wisdom. Is there still some old man that sits on top of a mountain? Perhaps I should look for a wise monk. Maybe the answer will be in some fortune cookie.
I have relatives coming next week. While they won’t be staying with me, I know they’ll be over frequently. So this has spurred another round of frantic cleaning. I did a bit more decluttering. There was a bag of old letters and cards that has been lingering in my bedroom for quite some time. Some of them date back to my university days. I didn’t know what to do with them before but today I was ruthless. I threw out most of them as they are from folks I don’t hear from or see anymore. There was a bag of stuff that spilled out of a book shelf. Most of it was old receipts but it took a couple of hours to sort and shred them. It even had my old credit cards, coffee cards, statements, lube, an old Japanese photo book of red light district and some magazines… it’s just bizzare what I kept.
I still want to get a new rug for the living room and a new futon cover. Both have seen better days although I plan to reuse the old rug underneath my desk.
I also cleaned my pantry which are 2 metal racks. I took everything off the racks, wiped down the racks, and cleaned everything before putting it back. As I look around the kitchen, I think I have to replace the microwave the sits on top of the stove. I won’t mind replacing the stove too although it still works. I had an electrician come in last week to look at my lights. I want to change my old track lighting to LED.
Eventually I want to get my bathroom renovated and put new carpet in my bedroom. I also want to repaint my unit and update the kitchen. The blinds are probably the last thing on my list. And maybe some new furniture.
The list of things I want to do with my condo is endless but my bank account isn’t.
I jammed my thumb some months ago and it still hasn’t fully recovered. I feel it when I’m trying to hold something heavy like a pot or a wok. I’ve tried pulling it on it to see if it would reseat itself but that didn’t work. My shoulder (mostly the left shoulder) screams in pain if I pull it back. I have no idea what I did to it. Maybe carrying a 15 lb knapsack doesn’t help. Then there is pain in the main joint of my second toe. It’s mostly my left foot but my right foot has it too. My podiatrist diagnosed it as capsulitis. I wear sensible shoes and use a cream to help reduce the pain. I already wear orthotics because of my flat feet. If this gets worse then I have to get injections. Ugh.
If you see someone with a big head, walking with a limp and his left arm dangling, please buy him a beer.
I’m getting old.
For someone without a job, I’m one of the lucky ones. Everyone I’ve met at my job counseling firm has a story.
I met a woman who was contemplating a career change to become a teacher. But she has 2 kids still in school. As part of her severance, her employer gave her 3 months of job counseling and time is closing fast. A few weeks later, I found out she lost her husband earlier this year. The dreams of becoming a teacher would be shelved for now.
There was another IT geek who wasn’t sure what he wanted to do. His hair and beard needed needed some serious trimming and unfortunately in this job market, physical impressions do count. It wasn’t until I checked his LinkedIn profile did I realize he was actually an IT architect. He’s got some decent credentials. He never spoke about his accomplishments or what he wanted to do next.
Another woman hinted that she has had clinical depression but said she’s pretty sure she doesn’t have it now. She just wants this job hunting to end. She used to cherish time away from work. Now the abundance of free time feels confining and she’s not sure what life has in store for her.
Then there was a guy who turned down a couple of job offers. It surprised me until he explained those job paid less than his previous role and it involved a lot of travel. He is the only child and is now facing elder care issues. We chat briefly and exchange contact info.
Another project manager has a young family. He doesn’t have a lot of Canadian experience and is willing to work in small cities where there might be less competition. I asked him if his family will move with him. He said no, he’ll find some place cheap to live and send money back to his family.
There are so many people here who could use a break. There just doesn’t seem to be enough well paying jobs to go around. Everyone has a story to tell.
It was a quiet Sunday morning and I was out for a walk. I was standing by the crosswalk waiting for the light to turn green. There was a man on a wheelchair who was struggling to get through the intersection. He was very fat and his stomach stuck out in the cold air. He just had about 5 to 10 meters to get to the sidewalk and the light had already turned. As the cars waited, I went to the guy and told him I would help him get to the sidewalk.
He mumbled ok and I quickly got him to the sidewalk. As I was pushing up on the sidewalk, a plastic liquor bottle fell to the sidewalk. I stopped and walked over to get it for him. He screamed “No, no… f*ck, f*ck, f*ck no, leave it!” I paused and watched him slowly bend over to retrieve it. “Everyone just keeps taking my stuff!”
Once he got his bottle back, I gave him one last push to the level ground and asked if he was ok. He gave a quiet “Yeah” and slowly moved on.
I lined up behind a guy at the coffee shop while he was paying. Then I heard a gruff voice say “The line up is back here!” I looked over a few feet to my right. A tall and angry looking, heavy set white man raised his hand with his thumb pointed behind him.
Confused, I took a couple of steps back and wondered how I missed the line. The customer in front of me left. The cashier looked up and said “next please”. Because I had stepped back, the cashier looked at the big buy and gestured him over. He then walked into what would have been my spot. A lady at the other line for a different cashier looked at him and said I was in the right line.
I walked up behind the big guy and said “I guess I was in the right place.” He was tall, my head only came up to his shoulders. But he was overweight and out of shape (not that I was any better). My annoyance started to move towards anger and I’m sure he heard it in my voice.
He turned around and to my surprise, he apologized. I just nodded and said “It’s ok.” He was about to order and then turned around again and offered to swap places. I told him it was fine. He explained that at the other outlets, you line up in the center and the cashiers calls for the next one in line rather than this outlet where you line up in front of the cashier. I gave him a pat on the shoulder “I understand, enjoy your coffee and have a nice day.” He said the same and left.
I’m glad our guardian angels made sure we didn’t ruin each others day.