Yesterday I decided to read more about the surgical procedure I’m going to undergo next week. I’ve already read a lot so I wasn’t expecting to find anything new. Then I saw a few new things. After the surgery, I have to keep my leg still for at least 4 hours so there won’t be any bleeding. I would have to use a bed pan and urinal if I had to go. Hmm…. $#%#@%^$%&#&
Then I read a few new things. Some people complained about constant and chest pain after the surgery and feeling very tired. This would go on for months. I felt a new sense of dread. I went through the reasons for my surgery and they are still sound. I closed my laptop and decided that I’ve read enough. I go in for tests this Thursday. I was told this would take the whole day.
Maybe all of this is just nervousness. The closer it gets, the more I think about it and all the bad things that could happen instead of focusing on the positive.
But I felt better after going to the gym last night for a brief workout. It wasn’t anything intense. But I just wanted to be more active since I just sit all day. On Friday, I woke up early and walked in the park before starting work. I even squeezed in 5 flights of stairs during a break. So I’ll gradually add more each day until it becomes a habit. Of course I’ve been saying this for sometime.