Some Questions on Life

I really should keep up with my blogging.  Life just gets in the way sometimes.  I haven’t responded to a lot of comments but thank you to all of you. 

Many of you are wiser than I am.  Perhaps you can share your insights and perspective. 

1.  Some people seem to have an easier life than others?  They seem to have an easier time making friends, being wealthy, better family life, good looks, more friends, etc…   But for others, it’s a one day at a time existence; life is a struggle and one has to work hard to get what you need.  It can even be lonely.  What advice would you give others who are part of the latter group?

2.  How do you stay positive and not give up when life can be so unfair?  How do you stay strong?  How do you keep your dreams alive?

3.   Adversity in life can make someone stronger.  Do you agree or disagree and why?

4.  Where do you draw inspiration and hope from?

 

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25 thoughts on “Some Questions on Life

  1. I don’t know if am wiser.

    I often feel others have it better, easier, etc., but the grass is always greener on the other side. These people have their burdens as well.

    How to stay positive? I am the wrong person to answer that. I am Mr. Negative.

  2. The greatest comfort I find in life is the statement, “this too, shall pass”. Any moment we have, wonderful or terrible, is just one moment and another moment will come soon that will be different.

    As for the perception of some people having an easier life than others, I’ve come to believe that it is only perception. Each of us carries with us fears, burdens, insecurities, joys, successes, and tedium – and to each of us, those are the biggest fears, burdens, insecurities, joys, successes, and tedium in the world.

  3. to be honest matt, I couldn’t help with this because outside of having my family and the girl of my dreams, I’m pretty much caught up in the death spiral of misery and perpetual self-loathing. I wish things were as easy as a self-help book but life is what it is.

    i guess the only thing we can do is find the things that make us happy and put it into a social context. like,cooking or painting or sight-seeing – if we do this with like minded people that share that passion, then we feel that bond of sorts. it keeps our souls from getting dark and heavy.

  4. Great questions, Matt!

    I think no matter how much money people have, or what kind of life they have, or how outgoing they are…EVERYONE has struggles! Everyone is lonely, scared, doubtful and sad at times. It’s just part of being human. All the outward things are nice…but they can’t change a person’s heart or take away inward/negative emotions.

    I think we all need good friends and family to help support us emotionally. People we can talk to/share our feelings and heart with. But, again, no-thing or no-one can meet all of our emotional needs. We must find ways to meet those needs…like hope peace, joy, mercy, etc…within ourselves.

    If we expect other people to meet ALL of our inner needs we will be disappointed.

    Doing things I enjoy help me to remain positive…give me hope that tomorrow can/will be better.

    Yes, we usually ONLY learn and grow stronger from the adversity. We find out who we are as people when we go through tough times.

    I draw hope and inspiration from friends, nature, books, art, my dog Cooper, my kids, writing, etc. 🙂

    I find groups help…like a book club, a hiking group, a group that goes out to socialize…whatever you like to do…find some people who are doing it and join them. 🙂

    Remember: You are not alone, Matt! Everyone struggle. Everyone needs friends. We are all so much alike inwardly. I hope you find the answers to your question. Keep seeking the answers. We are all fellow strugglers on this journey of life and need to help each other. 🙂

    HUGS!!! 🙂

  5. Oh…another thing I meant to say…I’ve always done volunteer work and that has helped me to remain positive and hopeful. Whenever I am volunteering to help other people, I end up being the one who receives joy. 🙂 You can find ways and places to volunteer…short term or long term work. 🙂

  6. 1. i think everyone faces struggles, difficulties, conflict.. but some mask their flaws and difficulties better than others. they might be private and not want to share their hardships; or maybe they are just really good about ‘saving face’ when deep down there are skeletons in their closets. i think a combination of both is true for most people.. because really, who doesn’t come from a dysfunctional family? everyone is dysfunctional in SOME way or other- we are human and are prone to err.

    thus the only way i know to cope with this reality is to believe in a God who is Holy, perfect without blemish. He is bigger and more powerful than all these problems. He is with me, and reminds me that I’m not alone in my struggle.

    2. it’s easy to get critical and skeptical… i try to find my joy in God.

    3. i agree… “we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. (Romans 5:3)

    4. i once felt very hopeless … it was a time in my life where i really could not envision that there was any reason to live. i prayed a desperate prayer, and God answered that prayer. since then He has given me hope, and that hope compels me to press on.

    i’m not sure where it is that you are, but wherever it may be, may God be near to you.

  7. Everyone who commented before me has basically covered it. But something that’s also important here is to avoid comparing yourself to others in order to grow. I’ve struggled with this one forever, but as I come out of it I’ve found my own life to be fuller. Other people are other people with their own stories. My attention is better focused on what I do have, what I want, and how I’m going to get it. If there’s one piece of advice I’d give, it’s to have gratitude for something every day.

    Somedays, it’s impossible to ignore the weight of the world and that’s okay. I don’t think there’s any one way to stay positive… if it were that easy, we’d all be living happy lives. Just don’t let it consume you. Do not dwell. Train your mind to recognize when you’re falling into negative thought patterns, this is a great start. It isn’t always easy so do not lose hope.

    Once you’re able to identify these thought patterns, you can try reversing them. For example, when you notice yourself being envious of someone else’s life, try asking yourself what it is you’re envious of and if those things realistically fit into your life. Can you make those things happen for yourself? Will they truly bring you happiness? If not, what will?

    I hope this was in some way helpful. Great post!

  8. I am not boasting, but I’ve come from a place where I was having anxiety talking to people to a point where I infiltrate all social circles in my school. The transformation is unbelievable.
    Not sure how all this happened…
    It’s the confidence and the sense of humor, I suppose…

  9. Oh yeah, so I am in the school focused on positive psychology…you know…psychology that focuses on good traits of people…
    They said one of the best way to remain hopeful and optimistic is to always take time to appreciate good things that happened in life or as it is happening. Feel thankful for it.
    That’s it. Just take time to appreciate it and remind yourself of it at the end of the day.

  10. i think this is a great post. very provocative. i often think about #1 myself and i think i’ve come to believe/accept that there are no groups of have’s and have not’s. everyone at some point in their life feels some type of adversity. they may be “first world problems” or they may be life-threatening but people all struggle with their own demons. and in that way, we are really all just human.

    this is not to say that everyone is born equally or has a fair chance in the world. i myself consider myself extremely lucky to grow up as a low to middle class US citizen instead of a poverty-stricken throw-away baby in china. i grew up poor by US standards, so i was worse off than the kids with silver spoons in their mouths.

    but i think that hardships and life experiences can make or break you. children that grow up rich and spoiled may either become successful because of their supportive and bourgeoisie family connections, or they can become embarrassments to their family and have nothing to show for themselves. likewise, those that grow up poor can grow up to be very successful, optimistic people or they can fall by the wayside and become drug addicts or homeless people.

    but back to your original question, my advice to the latter group of whatever talent or luck has been bestowed upon me is that there is something you can excel at or be passionate about. it may take more work than it seems to take other people, but you cannot expect anything to come for free. (if you do, prepare for a lifetime of disappointment.) besides, the things you work hard for are more worth it anyway. if you’re working hard for something that makes you miserable, you should shift your attention and energy towards something that could possibly make you happy. that way, even if you aren’t the prettiest, luckiest, richest, most popular, you can be happy with the way you decided your life would be. easier said than done, but hey it’s more about the journey than the destination.

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