Me: Come to bed with me, don’t play hard to get again. I love to wrap my hands around you.
Sleep: You slave – keep begging.
Me: You’re my master and you own me.
Sleep: That’s a good start but you’re not worthy of my company. I want you to spill secrets.
Me: You already know my secrets.
Sleep: But your readers don’t. Hahaha…
Me: They know me already.
Sleep: But not those deep, dark secrets. Well, if you don’t want my company then I have other things to do.
Me: You prick, I’m taking my meds.
Sleep: No you won’t. You need to get up early and you have a busy day.
Me: I’ll get a couple of espressos.
Sleep: You’ll still be groggy. Just spill some secrets and I’ll be get in bed with you. Just close your eyes and imagine how delicious I am.
This is the kind of crap I go through most nights. No secrets yet… maybe another time. But what would you like to know?
My body has been out of rhythm for awhile now. I’ve had foot problems since my 20s and had to wear orthotics to address pronation problems my flat feet. Now I’ve got some pain in one of the joints of my second toe (capsulitis). I had it last year but it went away when I got new orthotics and new shoes. My podiatrist suggested getting new shoes again with more cushioning in the midsole and less toe lift. The orthotics are still in decent shape. It can be painful walking sometimes and unlike last summer, my daily morning walks has stopped and my weight is slowly climbing back up. It’s just so frustrating.
My shoulder and thumb are slowly healing. Once it fully heals, I can start lifting some weights. I had an eye infection (stye) but thanks to some antibiotic eye drops, this is now going away. I also have a bit of a stomach flu but it was mild compared to the food poisoning I picked up Singapore. Hopefully it be gone by the weekend.
I need to find the fountain of youth.
On the subway train this morning, there was a motorized cart that looked like a motorcycle or scooter. I was admiring it and didn’t notice the passengers around me when I sat down. My seat was 90 degrees to another seat. Think of the letter “L”. I was on the bottom of the L and the other seat was on the side of the “L” So I sat facing “north” and the other passenger who sat in front of me faced “east”. It was a man who was quite disheveled, with somewhat dirty clothes and the smell of whiskey.
He turned to face me and extended his hand to shake mine. His hand poked out of a rumpled jacket. I shook his hand and noticed he had a firm handshake. He leaned over and asked if I was from Korea. I told him I’m from Toronto. He then asked if I knew (insert Korean name) who was a Tae Kwan Do master. I said no. He leaned towards me and put his hand on my forearm. Aside from him being filthy I didn’t sense any danger. The subway car was not packed but there were a lot of people. He then shook my hand again and thanked me for not breaking his neck.
Then he got a bottle of whiskey out and offered it to me. I politely decline. He started talking about something before launching into a song. When the next stop came, I got up and told him this was my stop. Just as the train came to a stop, I heard him shouting to someone “What the f* are you staring at?”.
At the platform, I took out a sanitary wipe from my knapsack and cleaned my hands and forearms. I was on my way to see a doctor for an eye infection and didn’t want to accidentally scratch my eye.
I think when people see my big head, they must think I’m very approachable. But my big head has not charmed any handsome, athletic, cute guys.
I’ve visited my chiropractor twice recently. My back was giving me some problems and I also have pain in my shoulder and thumb. My doctor told me to get some physiotherapy. Since I was seeing my chiropractor about my stiff back, I showed him the diagnosis from my doctor and asked if he could also help. So my chiropractor worked on my back, shoulders and thumb for about 45 mins.
It’s always a bit awkward for me to see him. He’s young, Chinese, incredibly good looking, muscular and always looks like he just stepped out of a fashion shoot. I try not to tense up when he touches me. He held my hand while he worked on my thumb which made me swoon a bit. While he was holding my hand and making small talk, he mentioned an upcoming vacation with his girl friend. I think this is what straight guys do to make sure there are no “misunderstandings”.
a date an appointment with him again this week. On a more serious note, I hope my shoulder will heal. I can’t figure out what I did to injure it though.
This is a beautifully written story by Catherine Porter formerly of the Toronto Star. I took a peek at the story and couldn’t divert my attention.
What’s weird is that at a webinar this morning, there was a demonstration about putting your life’s priorities first before taking on the other less important but time consuming tasks. People were given a empty bowl along with 2 bowls. One had small gravel representing the many urgent but not important tasks in life. The other bowl had large rocks representing things like health, passion, love, family – the important things in life. They had to fill the empty bowl with the contents from those 2 bowls without going over the top of the bowl.
Of course, if you filled the bowl first with the small gravel, you couldn’t add all the big rocks in. The trick is to put the big rocks in first and then pour the small gravel so they fall all around spaces left by the big rocks.
Sometimes I think life sends us messages in many different ways.
I was about to go to sleep when a car alarm went off. It kept on going so I went to the window to see which stupid car it was. It was some SUV parked across the street, the trunk was open. But no one showed up. After a couple of long minutes, it finally shut itself off. I was about to go back when I saw two nicely dressed women scampering around the corner. One of them squatted on the sidewalk to pee while the other tried to cover her.
Ugh. I just know I’ll have either a sleepless night or nightmares.
Sigh – the quality of my writing has reached a new depth.
Looking for a job is a job. Lately, I just don’t feel like working. When people ask me what I want to do, I give them my usual 30 second commercial. But deep down, I just want to read, write and take photos. When I walk by a panhandler, I sometimes see myself in that role. It’s illogical and unsettling.
Anyways… I’m tailoring a resume to a job opening. I hope to finish it today and move on to the cover letter.
The cool and rainy weather the past couple of days hasn’t helped my mood. And my DSLR is spitting out error messages (err 99 code).
I think it’s time to restart my gratitude journal.